Hey, long time, no see... Sorry 'bout that.
If you're reading this, I can assume that you're curious about what I've been up to lately. I tend to keep things pretty private, but I feel that it's about time I update those who are a part of my support system, like yourself.
The life of a creator has its natural ebbs and flows. Periods of self-doubt, seemingly unworthy ideas, un-finishable material, and withering of the heart, followed by seasons of confidence, free word-flow, inspiring breaths, and healing. Currently, I'm in the latter, but I was stuck in the former for far too long.
And here's why.
Songwriting is tough. Acknowledging your feelings is foreign. Expressing your emotions is exhausting. And having your inner thoughts, fears and desires put on public display requires such vulnerability that it feels as if parts of your soul are being given away with each measure and each phrase, each and every time someone listens. It's crazy. And it can make you crazy. Presenting yourself as an open book leaves you susceptible to the stripping of your self-worth. When a friend stops listening to your song before it's over, when the beat doesn't make their head bop, when you don't hear a hum-along by the second chorus, the feeling of failure begins to set in. And because the song is not just a piece of your work, but a piece of your soul, you yourself begin to feel unworthy of that person's time, unworthy of that person's enthusiasm, and unworthy of true human connection. It makes your chest cave in. And from the moment a hint of disinterest creeps upon a listener's face, self-doubt begins to seep through every pore. It. Fucking. Sucks.
But here's the deal. The above paragraph does not depict the whole truth. What it does do, however, is bring to the light the demon each artist has to battle, day in and day out: their inner voice.
My inner voice has begun to sing a new tune these days. I don't know if it's because I'm finally getting validation through new songwriting opportunities, if it's because I'm seeing a massive leap in the level of excitement from friends and peers about my work, or because I've finally found confidence in my own voice, but I feel more creatively alive than ever before. I feel empowered, I feel inspired daily, and I'm writing songs that not only tell the stories of my life, but truly express them; the ups and the downs, the ebbs and the flows, the real and the raw, the ugly and the beautiful, and I simply cannot wait to share them with you all.
Through this new season of inspired life, I have created songs that are far better than anything I've ever done before. The sound is dark, quirky and raw and sets quite a different tone than any past releases or creations. They feel like home to me. So, with great excitement, I'd like to let you in on the secret that I am creating a body of work to be released as an EP in the fall across digital music platforms. There are no details yet to give, but I promise to keep you updated as the story progresses.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, and thank you 10-fold for your support and love.
Wishing positive vibes upon your inner voice, and for you, a season of inspired life.